The Growth Police
“This you?” “Drag him!” “Ratio her!”
The “this you?” phrase is a popular Twitter slang that is used to humiliate a tweep into accountability. It is evidence used to call out tweeps who have made controversial tweets that contrasts with their past views/opinions – no matter how far back they held that opinion. Then they are “dragged” – publicly humiliated – and “ratioed”
This practice has become common place on social media platforms where people are quick to dredge up a person’s past shortcomings as a yardstick for who they are in the present.
On social media, it is unshakably believed that opinions are fixed and unchanging, for to do that, it meant being a hypocrite; there was nary a place for growth. It is invariably expected that people must hold to whatever views they have held in the past and deviating meant they were two-timing flip-floppers who spoke from two sides of their lips and were highly undependable.
I believe it is time to challenge this mentality. Short of being a criminally offensive opinion that is damaging or hurtful to a person, – and even subliminally, this can be reappraised, because humans are in in all ramification imperfect beings – people should be given the opportunity to change their stances. Changing their stance on a subject matter or their past behaviors doesn’t mean they are condemnable and have committed the ultimate sin.
There is a mountainous pressure people put on others expecting them to be as perfect as a picture and have everything about life & themselves figured out – something we also fall short of.
Before you point your finger, make sure your hands are clean –Bob Marley
When we judge others and condemn them to damnation, we forget to judge ourselves first; to look within us to our own shortcomings. Rather we make excuses for our own actions and behaviors. It is indeed hard for humans to put themselves under the same microscope as they do others; often quick to justify our means by our ends.
You’re allowed to change your views. You’re allowed to grow. You don’t have to prove your growth to anyone but yourself. One thing that is constant is change.
I’m definitely not the same I was yesterday. I’ve unlearned and still unlearning some of the things I held as gospel.
Just recently I had to learn that feeling guilty about getting gifts without reciprocating was an unhealthy way to live. I had in fact being forgetting to appreciate gifts for I get stuck in my head trying to get a gift for them of the same or approximately same value, to show I wasn’t indebted to them, when it was simply a kind gesture I had to appreciate – I still struggle with this a bit.
That said, changing your opinion is not a sin nor does it mean you are a bad person. On the contrary, this is a sign of intellectual strength; being able to introspect, reassess, compare and contrast with the advent of new information; your position, shows you are in fact high in cognition.
If for instance, you have listened to someone else’s point of view and then recognized the value that lies in their own opinion, reevaluating your stance on whatever the subject matter may be doesn’t make one a hypocrite.
When we as a society reject change, or place an embargo against modification, unlearning and relearning of the self, we inhibit growth, and stop progress. The inability to change, progress, or grow simply results in stasis and torpidity.
Although that isn’t to say that one mustn’t watch the words one throws at others. If your opinion, view or action is one that can damage a person or their identity, and then later you hide under the guise of growth/change to cover up your mess, take heed to refrain from doing so. Use your words wisely, think before you act. You the speaker may forget but the recipient would always remember how your opinion/action made them feel.